So Long Lansing MI> Hello Detroit Aiport, Boarding For Tampa yesterday

Not perfectly lined up in three shots
closeups in sections of the clock tower
to the right
of the
9/11 memorial on the right side
in Lansing MICHIGAN!
Another amazing sight to behold while I was there!
And this is inside close up of the bottom third…
Rather stunning isn’t it?
I looked on amazed at it’s workings!
So now,
it is up to you to line it all up
in a perfect architectural line
of great beauty
cos’ it truly was!
Now about three blocks in the other direction of the Radisson
where I stayed…
was a most lovely view of the capital there
And on the little streets
more eateries than one could count
the oldest bank in Lansing with lovely
architectural style
and one way streets
folks walking here and there
Not very far
Home of
the home of the Spartans
a stadium that holds 75,000 people
that is usually field when the folks
follow their team
to successes
on the football and basketball seasons
inside and out.
where Magic Johnson
began a career that
left people glued to the screen
and the auditoriums
as he
amazed and delighted
as a point guard
then moved on to the Lakers!
“Oh how Kamryn will be delighted to receive his Jersey from Michigan State”!
And at the end of a particularly long and draining
seminar with a small group of Professionals
including a physician, a couple of nurse practitioners,
lovely social workers, a physician assistant,
a funeral industry worker who had fabulous self care tools solidly intact and was not sure why she had come to this session, and others who were demonstrating signs and symptoms of Compassion Fatigue
more than 3/4’s of the room who have trouble sleeping;
and speaking to a few afterwards…
I went for a walk
and looked down to the most remarkable
“dinner plate size hibiscus”
only a few steps later to discover one
on my way to see the capital!
What a lovely gift they were to my eyes and senses.
After two most incredible days in Michigan
with health and mental health professionals in
Traverse City and Grand Rapids
I was rather amazed at the small turn out
in Lansing
the home of the capital, the home of the
9/11 Remembrance Memorial.
there was also a few nurses in the small crowd
including a couple together that were great friends;
both each others best support systems
with one having been a nurse working for 39 years.
She had humor, she had Compassion fatigue
luckily they both had each other for support
during the hard work they do.
There were three sitting in the back row
I believe they were social workers;
one in the profession 1 year, one 16 months, and the other a fun young woman with a lot on her plate now
as her dad is dying and in hospice care.
I enjoyed her so, and she purchased a copy
Healing Heartaches to give her “MeMae”
as a gift and has been a social worker for only a short time maybe a year or two.
AFter lunch a switch had happened; that was unlike any city or state I had been in. They seemed to have lost their comfort zone as a result of one or two other persons in the room, as a few told me after the seminar.
They could not laugh anymore; they appeared weary
I worked hard to restore that for them
but to no avail.
It was rather heart breaking to see
I felt badly for them
even the funny slides did not prompt laughter for them
nor re circuit the brain to allow them permission
to laugh or relax.
It was as if they were overloaded
exhausted by their own issues or that they were just
done for the day.
As flat as it felt and appeared
Having spoken across the globe, I think pehaps their compassion fatigue had perhaps been placed in front of them, and they were now having to feel the impact of it
now that it had been put in the frontal lobes of the brain and a couple had questioned the validity of it.
Sometimes getting real is asking for self honestyand self honesty means self transparency, which requires the the ability to to look inward to cultivate insight and questing ones own self beliefs while stepping out of one’s comfort zone.
But essential to that development of self honesty
is the ability and need to suspend judgment
and criticism
and to halt judgment
and the automatic response of immediately categorizing a concept or idea according to an already exist set of ideas of what right might be right, wrong, good or bad, or possible or impossible; what may be well thought o if or not, pronounced to your liking or not, what may be funny or not.
Suspending or putting a stop to your personal/professional judgment is not easy for others; it takes stepping outside of yourself and being open, while temporarily stepping outside of self and into others!
This requires feeling safe in a room of those you do not know and letting go of ego, and accepting that we all are one, guided by the Universal Energy of all.
As I have spoken to thousands across the lands
I have been told that
unquestionable beliefs; those basic ideas we hold feverishly too that often become stagnant or outdated over time can have remarkable powers to shape our perception by creating expectations within us
can often and do often project onto the external world and those living within in it.
That may be some of the problem we have in the world today along with standing shoulder to shoulder with others along with finding new ways to do things
to coexist with others and new ideas!
Those things we feel and think are selected and shaped to a great extent by what we unconsciously expect to experience and
ultimately become
“self fulfilling prophecies”
and then
we then give mixed messages to our brains
and continually are amazed when we get mixed results.
People like to be right about things, the need to be right is one of our strongest and most strongly defended intentions it seems. Mostly because is supports and enforces the ego illusion like this:
“I alone am special, different and somehow more entitled than others.”
We see this daily in our lives, by those on the HIll up there arguing for what is right for the people,
in the medical communities
when hearing doctors fighting within their fields
then feeling superior to nurses or social workers
or chiropractors
or patients
as if their titles make them better or more special.
We see it in families, when one or many stand in judgment of others and think they always know more, a better way of doing things
would rather not speak, but harbor ill will
rather than utter that
they are “sorry for words spoken in anger or haste, or ugliness”.
The Ego is a mighty thing isn’t it?
I often tell thousands I speak with
Compassion Fatigue seminars across the lands
support is critical; that self-honesty, personal responsibility, and that openness to want to balance body mind and spirit
with self care are essential
to healing self in order to best care for others.
I stress the value of humor
that self care and humor are not optional,
I have stressed it here
more times than not.

And, when this slide showed on humor near the end of the day and less than 10% of the audience laughed loud… I knew that someone had pulled the plug, the line had gone flat on the engagement, energy, emotion of the day, the safe zone was gone for those there to experience fully…
1. Their brains were on overload
from a day filled with information
2. Their Compassion Fatigue was just too much
3. The mood had shifted as a result of some just not able to now feel comfortable anymore
it was a first as at that time of the day, with the seminar being powerful, the individual work being done
the humor and its importance recognized
this slide usually evoking great laughter
and release.
So friends,
as a few dropped by to say so long and thank you, others left quickly and quietly after handing in evaluations and picking up their CEU’s
some said it was a good/great evaluation.
One said it was
“thought provoking”
and rather engage in some of the exericse
I couldn’t help but noticing she was writing feverishly the slides that were shown.
I am ever so glad that
I do not take tylenol for the fevers of others.

I couldn’t help but think of the others in the last two days,
the sounds of the laughter shared in both cities, as I reflected on their willingness to step out of thei comfort zones,
the area of practice to embrace and honor the stories of each other, while stepping through their stories of pain, and the stories they hold inside
some of their traumas they have attended to and by the afternoon talk about how good it felt to hear not only the sound of their own laughter but that of the others in the room.
In those other Michigan cities people left feeling much lighter, having exhanged phone numbers and names so that they would have established a supportive network that would help them in their work of combating
compassion fatigue in the future
using the tools they recieved from a day together of
hard work, refinding old tools and new
ways of implementing them
thanks to
PESI/CMI bringing them together
for this seminar.
I truly hope that some of the folks of
Lansing will find their way to others
and be able to do the same
in their city
in their life.

After I thanked my coordinator and we visited a bit, she packed up all the information to be shipped back to WI,
and she herself headed home for a 2 hour drive to her home.
I took a walk and then
met a lovely young man
named MIKE
in the bar
and enjoyed a lovely dinner.
I have forgotten the water’s name but he too was delightful.
I never met the GM as it seems they are not visible like at the
Holiday INN in Traverse City!
the room service tray sat outside my door for two days and nights
without being picked up although I did inform folks at the desk!
I enjoyed Mike at the bar, he was delightful, kind and friendly and
will be entering Michigan State
with great hopes of a PhD in Math
and hopes to teach at a University.
“Best of luck MIKE”
you will be great!
I also had the fortune of meeting a young man named Jason
the Valet
who also kept a watchful eye on my comings and goings
was most delightful and helpful
I felt safe under his eye
I hope he will move on up to manager
because he knows how to treat guests there.
I was up at 430am and off to return the rental car as Avis said it was due back at 6am.
Well I was there in plenty of time,
standing at an empty counter after filling it up and parking, recording the mileage and keeping my part of the contract.
After 20 minutes still no agent, I noticed a box and it said,
drop the contract and keys in the slot.
Problem was,
slot was taped closed,
then noticed the sign that said, if we are closed go to the budget counter!
Went to the budget Rental Car Counter where I saw a sign that read,
“If we are closed please see the
AVIS Counter”.
Returned to Avis,
dialed the friendly 800 number and after waiting and waiting
spoke to three agents
then was told,
“uh, ere, well, you can leave the keys and contract on the desk behind the counter”.
I said
“Would you like me to leave the GPS there as well, since I now have been here 45 minutes and have a flight to catch”.
To which they replied,
“Only if you want to be responsible, I would suggest leaving the airport, returning to the car, locking it in the car, returning to the counter and then leaving the keys and the document behind the counter for the next available agent”…
You can imagine, at that hour at that point
AVIS had entered my “happy place, and managed to drop a brick on it.”
So I let them know my thoughts on their
professionalism, their information system for customers, and promply hung up
after also letting them know that their are other rental agencies.

Arrived at my gate and had to have a bite to eat…
Met a lovely woman at the small counter of the
Spartan Pub,
Jimmy Dean sausage/egg/cheese muffin, milk, coffee
and a conversation with an unemployed
social worker
who NEEDS to be working in the field!
We talked a bit and she was friendly and kind.
Thank you Ms Spartan Pub Social Worker!

I found TSA and they liked me, I liked them
it was off to Detroit,
air to ground 38 minutes,
taxi time seemed much longer to the gate.
in my happy place.
CLICKING MY HEELS at the baggage claim,
Action Sedans waiting for me
trunk open
Michelle takes my bags,
I’m in the back seat, resisting the urge to ask her to pull over so I can
kiss the waters edge.
Color me happy.
Met an absolutely wonderful woman on the plane who works for the
Detroit Medical Center
we had a lovely conversation.
Hope she will let me know
she needs me to come out and do a keynote
at her next event for her staff their,
I would love to see Detroit,
The Motor City
home to some fine muscians.

I learned that if a person in Lansing was diagnosed with Cancer,
they should get to
Detroit Medical Center
University of Detroit
as they are cutting edge in Cancer treatment and research
this woman was bright, powerful
had years of experience. She was real, she was a woman that reminded me of those I have had the honor to work with before
“no nonsense, but with a passion that continues”.
Thanks Dr Iris, it was an honor to meet you.

there you go,
another virtual and very real journey
now it is time to rest.

Happy Saturday
to all.

Mom is doing great, back from
“La La land” almost off the pain meds
and doing much better.
She returns via chauffer Angie to NC for her follow up with the Cancer Doc
and we are praying and saying
“cancer free”
that she will return to a life that is now
like the good ole’ days
of no more health scares, no more deaths who are ill or dying
a life lived with joy and stress free for
She thanks all here for your support and prayers.

The fire is lit, burning brightly and the sage is going up,
with hope, healing and prayers in the air
for all who enter here.
Will be asking for some special strength for some warriors tomorrow.

“The Life you live is either inspiration
or Desperation”

Walk In Beauty,
author of
Healing Heartaches

7 comments on “So Long Lansing MI> Hello Detroit Aiport, Boarding For Tampa yesterday

  1. Hi, My first visit to this site. I learned about it from the book I bought at the Travis City Seminar on Compassion Fatigue. It was the BEST Seminar I have evr attended. I read about Lansing. Sorry they were intimidated by one egomaniac. We loved the humor, the insights, and we loved you. come back soon. I'll sign up no matter what the topic. You restored my confidence in me to attend to my needs. I came away feeling revitalized and with a satchel of new tools to boost my ability to continue to do this very difficult and emotionall taxing work. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.Sign me Grateful,Renewed and Refueled.

  2. hellooooooooo.cheers to the comment above !!They did hear you Doc.. and blessed they were. I count my blessings each day since we have met and sure have learned alot..just saying.. WELCOME HOME !!relax, kick back and get some rest..thanks for sharing and I'm exhausted hearing about the long days you have had.. time for bed here now, sign me, as usual,hugging my angels with love…A. ♥

  3. Greetings Dr. Showalter,I was in your conference in Lansing. You were awesome! What was up with that woman that introduced herself as a Social Worker and then later claimed to be a Physician. Who peed in her cherrios? She brought the whole group down. We talked about it at lunch and everybody wished she would leave early. I would sure hate to be here. She must live one miserable life, just because she can't escape her own self. If she really is a doctor, I wouldn't let her touch me with a ten foot pole.Thank you for coming here even though that woman ruined every effort we made to hang on and wish her away. You are the best. Even though we were afriad to speak up with her there, we all agreed that we learned alot and am glad we came.

  4. Welcome Home Doc! Long trip. Lansing Sucks!Don't go back there. Nobody should. There are a million better places to travel. Trust me. Sunny here and beautiful this evening. Work week done and time to relax and enjoy. Don't let the bastards get ya down folks. We gather here together because we can. STOMP!

  5. Dr.SES you are amazing to have been thru all of the good times and some not so good. I started looking at the pictures and thought what is wrong with me today. Crooked, yes they were, that is ok they were beautiful art and so well described for those of us who have never seen them. Thank you for all you do and for the people who got so much out of your program and for those who are so angry they cannot see the trees for the forrest. There is so much sickness and death in our lives that sometimes we get lost and dont think thru what is going on in others lives. I am so thankful I have a family that can help me thru the things I am going thru. Sometimes I fail to share with my family, it is not because I dont love them it is because I dont want to stress them out and interrupt their life. I guess that could be seen as selfish but we have to do what we do for the benefeit of others and their feelings. I am so happy you are home and I can imagine your bed feels so much better than any you slept in while traveling. Prayers to all who are sick and our service men and women. Their families who just buried the 30 who came home. So sad, so sad. Irene, it is your job to find Chris. I cant imagine, I just home it is her computer broke and she is well. Blessings to you DRSES and to all who visit you here. God Bless USA

  6. Oh Dr. Sherry, I enjoyed your words today and experiences here in Michigan. I am saddened for those in the Lansing group that seemed to have given up midway through. I sure would have loved to been there to hear you. I send an email to you with some information I wanted to share with you. I had not mentioned it before now but I do hope that the lady you spoke to at the DMC follows through and brings you back to Michigan. Please do let me know. You see, I work in the Trauma Department at Detroit Receiving Hospital in the Detroit Medical Center. In speaking to my coworkers, trauma nurse case workers, telling them about compassionate fatigue, showed them your article and as we talked I see each of us are in some way in the midst of compassion fatigue. All of them agreed that your conference would be most helpful for us. I know that there are many in our shoes at the DMC. Very scary times we are going through at this time. I am happy that you had some good memories of Lansing and especially those of Grand Rapids and Traverse City. I am sorry that it was not a good experience at the Lansing Hotel. I am happy to hear your Mom is on the mend. Prayers for COB as she sees the cancer doctor and will receive good news. Prayers for those here today and have a Blessed and Happy Saturday. I am off to the animal shelter where I volunteer. Sending love and hugs today. Sandy♥

  7. Morning Saturday, wow, quite a long read todayYour honest and detailed account of the trip was very interesting and real.TONITE, is the full STURGEON Moon.The fishing tribes are given credit for the naming of this Moon, since sturgeon, a large fish of the GREAT LAKES & other major bodies of water, were most readily caught during this month. A few tribes knew it as the Full Red Moon because, as the Moon rises, it appears reddish through any sultry haze. It was also called the Green Corn Moon or Grain Moon.That, my friends, is my final answer ! FIRMP.S.: can't find Chris' contact info….

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