Oh we Get To Choose!

Just like goodies at a bake sale,
so many choices and we get to make choices with each moment of our lives!
Oh the choices, the flavors the impact of our choices.
Even if we don’t make a choice we are making a choice and an impact whether we know or own it or not!
The decisions we make, the steps we take, all are choices.
We can own them, or shift it to someone or situations, but in reality they are ours friends!
I read a powerful blog this week by a friend of mine, and this is the link
it is worth the read, so be sure when you have the time to click here if you should choose to!
The title:
“The Past is Dead-Stop trying to Resurrect it”
Yes it was a powerful read, and spoke loudly to the choices we make in life; those who hold tightly to the past and choose to stay in toxic moments and relationships or situations or memories of things that just make for negative energy.
Some will say that they have no choice in matters like that; situations and pain caused in the past just cannot get out of their head and things like that.
But I say that is a choice made and fostered and fed.
WE all have stories in our lives, things that have happened and people who have hurt, harmed and disappointed us.
Yet if we choose to dwell on those times, or let it take up space in our brilliant minds it will affect our “now”, our vision and will cloud our thinking.
Before you know it time has passed and we “become the story”, others are recipients of hearing the same ole thing over and again until they no longer want to pick up the phone or they could recite and mouth what we are saying with little prompting.
Too much time spent looking in the rear view mirror sets us up for a crash not seeing what is ahead of us while missing what is in the now.
What a wasted now I’m thinking.
There are ways to process the events and the occurrences that have created that toxic feeling of wasted energy and time, to put it where it belongs, and let it go.
Why hold a coal of anger when the only one who will be burnt is yourself and your hand?
Rather than burn bridges, it would seem better to walk over them, into the next chapter or adventure with heads held high making a choice of change, and yes sadly there are times that walk is alone.
People and even relatives at times enter our lives for seasons and reasons, teaching lessons and even doing great harm if truth is told.
But there are those times when things just can’t be worked through or worked out and it is better to walk away with the lessons learned well and realize that there are those times when fences cannot be mended and blankets get torn.
It is rather amazing to see and hear of those who create such chaos and harm then turn around and utter the words, 
“I love you”
as you are finding ointment to put on the knife that has been used to cut deeply and that action was chosen by the one wielding it.
Words cut deeply and repeated times of negative behaviors and ugliness seem to be toxic relationships that do not change over time but only continue to play out in choices by those who do harm yet profess to love you.
that makes no sense to sustain toxic relationships that only serve to do harm does it?
We either choose to continue to be abused by these relationships and words or we choose to take a stand for our own integrity while realizing it is difficult to make the final decision.
People cannot use others as the reason to sustain toxicity as it spreads like a fire and affects all.
Choices to heal or to not treat wounds are truly choices that are faced each day.
Just as we now see and hear so much on the political platforms and hear people declaring that they are this or that.
When someone spends vast amounts of time telling you they are something it rather makes you wonder since they are investing so much energy trying to convince and sell a bill of goods while trashing others.
To build self while destroying others has never made me comfortable.
There must be a way for people to stand for self while boosting others I think.
We must build up our children and fellow women and men while standing strong united in all that we do.
Making solid choices and respecting those who are integrity filled and honest in interactions should not be so difficult, it goes back to the beginning of time.
We hear this week that people in another country were killed in savage ways for dancing,
we hear of protestors facing off between police and screaming through megaphones and have to wonder,
“seriously that helped who how”.
We see precious resources being spent with jobs not available and police departments working 18 hour shifts covering a convention why?
Where people gather and get jacked up while nominating a man for President that for all reasonable people we already know was the candidate.
As this is happening we now see the footage of Hurricane Issac hitting New Orleans on the anniversary of Katrina and the levy has broken while many are in harms way, yet many at this convention from LA have made the choice to remain in Tampa and party on.
Choices and leadership and those things that go bump in the night in our hearts and minds
as we all worry and wonder what will happen come election day.
I may be naive but I for one will be happy come Thanksgiving
for it will be over, and whoever will be in the White House will be there,
I just pray that women will stand up between then and now
as we need our voices heard and our bodies left alone and out of politics.
This is a year that has never meant more to women and men who know anatomy and the impact of respect and choice.
It is a time where we have to wonder
as I heard of children who are raped by their Mom’s boyfriends; of children who are growing up and wanting to be President and visit the moon as we say so long
to Neil Armstrong who made his mark so long ago.
He now visits the galaxies once again and is seeing the other side eternal.
We are in challenging times
and each day is still a gift.
But make no mistake,
whether folks choose to dwell in the darkness or fight like hell to emerge into the light
it is a choice!
If and when someone chooses to make or speak harshly or ugly to another; a friend or relative or bully in ways that are unacceptable,
it becomes that persons’ responsibility, right and ultimately their choice
to say “I’m not going to put up with this or you any longer”.
But in saying that, it is also saying that you will not harbor it in your heart or mind, but find a way to move it through you, and OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM… Let it go, and be free of it.
Everyone and I mean everyone has a story, but that does not mean that you need to BE the story.
Choose to live your life with clarity, hope, compassion and choices that are best for your life.
Imagine as many have and have stated they  get so sick of hearing it; meaning the negativity of certain people and situations.
Now imagine how sick someone who is not in that story may get of hearing the replays over time while knowing that you are not moving it from within, not working toward resolution and getting into your ever moving and growing life into the next chapter!
Life is for living with all that you have, it is not a black and white rerun of the past.
Memories that sustain, that fill you up are marvelous,
however those who suck the air out of you, need to be stopped.
Toxic relations are like toxic air;
they make you sick
and over time can kill.
Take control and make choices
that enhance your life,
remembering that bake sale and all the many choices!
Choose wisely friends
Make your mark in stone on what you stand for,
lend a hand, give a hand
but do not be harmed by the words or actions of others to the point of losing you in a story that has no ending or leaves you gasping for air that is fresh.
YOU are your most precious resource! Say
“Yes” to you as you leave your imprint on the day and others along the way with right way relations!
Prayers going up for those in New Orleans and the path of Issac;
may they feel the love and support of the Nation.
Special prayers today of support and strength for our warrior here Osh who is needing to know we are with you now as she faces some challenges, and for EE as she continues to fight hard on her health.
Walk in Beauty
for speaking inquiries
English: Emphasising choice in decision making...

English: Emphasising choice in decision making as a tool for achievement and empowerment Español: Acentuar la opción en la toma de decisión como herramienta para el logro y la capacitación (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

4 comments on “Oh we Get To Choose!

  1. Hello Dr. Sherry and friends. I don't know what happened to my long post today but it got lost somewhere. Just wanted to say thank you Dr. Sherry for your words of choices. We begin making choices as a baby and continue through out our life. Some good, some bad, some that affect our entire life and sometimes the life of others. It is good to be ever mindful of our choices and the consequences.
    Anonymous, your words touched my heart today and I held you in my prayers as I did EE, Osh and Dr. Sherry. I do hope your ear feels better Dr. Sherry. Take care friends and I hope you have a peaceful evening. /Sandy♥

  2. Great article. Thank you, Dr. Showalter for the mention in your Related Articles section, With love, joy and gratitude, Dr. Angi

  3. Reading this blog this morning has brought out some pain and suffering I have been going thru. I think that jealousey in a family can tear the family apart if we let it. I for one will not let anyone come between me and my family. Especially a family member. I do for others when they need and some family needs are greater than others. Your words of people living in misery and trying to make others miserable hit home this morning. What I do for family, friends or sometimes even enemy I do not wish to have pay, I do not throw this up in their face and I surely dont keep a record of what I do or what they owe me. I do it out of love. I only ask for respect. Jealousey is a real sickness that some people cannot get thru, they have needed help for most of their life. Most of it has been self inflicted. Sometimes in this life you wonder with all we have and all we share why would one be jealous of another. Is it because they cannot give love freely? Is it because they are so self centered they dont really care for anyone? Maybe they do not think how hurtful they can be to others and maybe they enjoy hurting others. I think a greater one will someday judge. I think the words you used today in your blog has triggered some pain in my heart and I had to get it out. I can say when someone is in your life and continues to hurt you and your family then it is time to turn away. Pray for them, prayers to Fluff and EE and to the families that Isaac is destroying, Go away Isaac. We are so secure in our lives and homes that sometimes we dont think of what is going on in the World. Some of us didnt have to work for their homes, they were given homes for awhile. Think about our lives and what we do to harm others, why not love and love unconditional. Prayers to all. Convention goers think of all the $$$$ that is being spent and look at all of the people whose live is being taken from them, did we not know that Mitt Romney was running for President? Think about it. Blessings to all who had to give up their life to patrol the streets of Tampa. Shame on you for letting this happen. Blessings

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