Oh I miss back then, as I ran up on this photo this day, I had to laugh out loud, remembering. The joys of faces, of races of bubbles being blown and far away times it seems. When D’Vante had a remote control jeep and promptly had little Olivia to lay in the kitchen floor and proceeded to try and run over her with his new found vehicle! Of Kamryn and that hair sitting for hours as Joan tried out new styles at the kitchen table and he never said a word but those eyes said all that would ever be needed to be heard as D‘Vante and Olivia sucked on Popsicles and watched in amazement being glad it was not them! Oh yea, I do miss back then, thinking I should have used duct tape on them to keep them that size and that innocent from the world and life in all its dimensions and many facets of growth. Oh what times we had from leaps down the staircase to basketball hoops hung on doors, to watching cartoons and joyous noise that bounced off the walls as sugar buzzes hit the little ones and teeth brushing while sitting on the counters, those were indeed the days. Measuring heights on poles on the porch and standing amazed as they grow and develop personalities and quirks along the way, realizing that they are growing and changing and foundations have been laid on love, faith, while it will ultimately be up to them the choices they make and the house they build.
What and who they will become will be influenced by who they hang with, what they think about how they are when away from home as they test waters and develop attitudes along the way as only kids do… One now is 18, says he is “grown” and oh my is he tall and looks grown indeed, but in his head that brain continues to develop and the tongue is one of the strongest muscles in the body… perhaps because of the exercise it gets?
Choices, decisions, attitudes about what is next, associations made and steps taken, stances made will be more important than ever now. As many will see on social media and more often think and say these words, even seen on tattoos of late “Only God can judge me”… many who do or say or make mistakes or bad choices usually revert to that saying it seems failing to understand that judgment is often made at judgment day and stems from all the individual and collective actions, steps and tongue wagging done in a life time. It is the daily reality that each step taken, each word spoken, each action on this earth is typically judged by everyone else; just take a look at the news for validation on that one or the pages of facebook, or the local watering hole and listen in on conversations. One doesn’t have to go far to realize that others actions and behaviors are constantly judged and assessed in the ways they live and treat others, the associations they keep, the appearance of their eyes and ability to tell truths or lies. In the end when one stands before the Creator yes it is judgment day; and all that is of course taken into the very judgment I would be sure to say, but it seems that those who use the standard line “only God can judge me” as they go about their day to day lives are only using it as a defense mechanism rather than dealing in reality and truth.
Young ones look to those who are older as role models; to those who they adore or those who they wish to be like. They often will try and copy behaviors, attitudes and style whether good bad or indifferent, sitting aside their innocence and picking up behaviors that often will need to be addressed with tough love and boundaries to set or reset that reminder of the golden rule, respect, truth telling and honesty along the way. Conversations at some point go by the wayside and most sound like this;
“how are you?”…. “GOOD”… “how was your day?…. “GOOD”…. “tell me of your day and what you did?……….”GOOD”
It may just be growing up, or it just may be that we have to dig a little deeper a little longer and try a bit harder to get where we want them to go in an effort to stimulate their interest in talking to us, the adult!
One thing is certain, there does come a time when they will remind us they are “grown” and when that time comes, it may be the time to let them fly from the nest and all that goes with it, all that they are saying is not all it’s cracked up to be once they are out from under the roof they become so comfortable under, it is then where the rubber meets the road and yes often the one who sets that moment is the one who cries and then says, “you are grown, so be grown on your dime”.
We all have that moment, and yet we look back at the foundations and realize, we are God’s children, and have been given this day to be all that we can be. Yes, we need to give thanks not ask God to deal with it, we have what we need to deal, it is time to stand up and do what we have to do, when we have to do it, with grace, dignity, truth and honor.
How many kids want to grow up to be scientists, healers, vets, football players, garbage men, woodworkers, drug dealers, stay at home moms, baby makers, alcoholics, surfers… and the list goes on and on… the choices made and the respect given or taken away each moment each day.
food for thought as we remember our youth, our kids our adults
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