A permanent solution to a temporary feeling; to pain that could should be managed, feelings that need to be talked through… SUICIDE is taking lives that are precious, people that are loved. Leaving behind so many who are numbed, traumatized, feeling guilt, shame, devastation while missing loved ones needlessly.
Suicide; know the signs, know the number to hotlines should you ever need to call. Should you ever need to call for yourself or someone you care about. DO NOT BE SHY, DO NOT BE AFRAID OF WHAT OTHERS MAY THINK…. YOU might save a life.
Native Americans deaths rank highest by suicide in our country.
Suicide is being grieved across the world and in the USA we are hearing of 10 year olds who complete suicide. Kids killing themselves secondary to “bullying” in schools, on the playgrounds, by their brothers and sisters. Suicide as the only way out of pain for these children; a permanent solution for what should be a temporary problem that adults should be monitoring, that the communities and world should have a zero tolerance toward.
Adults who walk with stress, who drink too much, who worry to frequently, who are in pain that is physical, spiritual, emotional.
leaving loved ones behind to find them, to mourn them, to grieve. Some move toward the light of healing while others just give up feeling there is no healing to be had. Another tragedy.
The statistics are staggering, the lives lost, the potential, the ones they left behind to wonder, to walk aimlessly through the fog of “why”.
The statistics of their pain to complex to measure, to horrific and long lasting to place a figure or a number on as each person is so very unique in their path through trauma, grief, healing. The stigma that is often associated with suicide also brands it as “disenfranchised grief” it seems.
Those People who try to commit suicide are often trying to get away from a life situation that seems impossible to deal with or something/someone. They often feel there is “no way out” for the moment, have withdrawn and have not talked it through with another. Many have also experienced bi-polar disorder, borderline personality disorder, depression, are taking substances, alcohol, synthetic drugs, or have PTSD. Some may be under the influence of drugs/alcohol at the time of the attempt or completion.
Many who make a suicide attempt are seeking relief from:
- Feeling ashamed, guilty,
- Feeling like a victim
- Feelings of rejection, loss, or loneliness
- Feelings of being worthless/loss of job/lack of money
- Feeling like a burden
- Feeling as though they cannot rise up to expectations of others
- Attention seeking
Suicidal behaviors may occur when there is a situation or event that the person finds overwhelming, such as:
- Aging (the elderly have the highest rate of suicide)
- Death of a loved one
- Dependence on drugs or alcohol
- Emotional trauma
- Serious physical illness
- Unemployment or money problems
- Cumulative sorrow
Risk factors for suicide in teenagers include:
- Access to guns
- Family member who committed suicide
- History of hurting themselves on purpose
- History of being neglected or abused
- Living in communities where there have been recent outbreaks of suicide in young people
- Romantic breakup
Some suicide attempts do not result in death. Many of these attempts are done in a way that makes rescue possible. These attempts are often a cry for help, for someone to care/intervene.
Some people attempt suicide in a way that is less likely to be fatal, such as poisoning or overdose.
Males, especially elderly men, are more likely to choose violent methods, such as shooting themselves. We are however seeing a rise in statistics of women shooting themselves in current times.
As a result, suicide attempts by gunshot are more likely to result in death.
Relatives of people who attempt or commit suicide often blame themselves or become very angry. They may see the suicide attempt as selfish. They will go through stages of grief in so many ways it can make the head spin, from denying suicide to anger at the person, at the way it happened, at themselves and the Creator. They will look for reasons until they find exhaustion takes them to their bed praying they are in the middle of someone else’s nightmare. And it will take time and work to get through the pain of such loss if suicide is the means of a loss.
However, people who try to commit suicide often mistakenly believe that they are doing their friends and relatives a favor by taking themselves out of the world. They are not thinking with their right minds many will tell you, their judgment is skewed, their pain, their moments are not in line with the ability to realize the sheer pain that will be left for those behind, nor the potential of their lives with working through the pain of their now.
More often than not, as many will look back they realize they talk about seeing things that were clues. Not always but sometimes a person will display certain symptoms or behaviors before a suicide attempt:
- Withdrawing from friends and family
- Not having much to say
- Having trouble concentrating or thinking clearly
- Giving away belongings
- Talking about going away or the need to “get my affairs in order”, “just getting stuff put away Mom”
- Suddenly changing behavior, especially calmness after a period of anxiety
- Seeming angry all the time or aloof
- Losing interest in activities they used to enjoy
- Performing self-destructive behaviors, such as heavily drinking alcohol, using illegal drugs, or cutting their body
- Pulling away from friends or not wanting to go out
- Suddenly having trouble in school or work
- Talking about death or suicide, or even saying that they want to hurt themselves
- “I wish I was just dead”, this sucks
- Talking about feeling hopeless or guilty
- “I should have been able to do something to save his/her life”
- Changing sleep or eating habits
- Arranging ways to take their own life (such as buying a gun or many pills on the street)
- Leaving notes/letters
- Closing down social media sites
- Saying good-byes
Veterans suicide hotline:
1 (800) 273 8255
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Please, if YOU or someone you know gives you or your gut the feeling that they are thinking of ending their life; make the call and get them some help…
“If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide.”
Find your footing, walk your steps, take baby steps.. laugh even through the tears, just keep laughing through the rain, the darkness, knowing the sun will shine again. Many blessings to all; may you fight to heal and stand in the sun…
Walk in beauty
- Guns most deadly choice in suicide attempts (usatoday.com)
- How is grieving a suicide different from grieving a non-suicide death blog 2 (dmeinegraham.wordpress.com)
- Borderline Personality Disorder & Suicidal Threats: Deconstructing the Manipulation Myth (pinkituscaderro.wordpress.com)
- The selfishness of suicide: What part of “mental illness” don’t you understand? (obsidianwings.blogs.com)
- Suicide Leaves Behind Nothing (dish.andrewsullivan.com)
- Borderline Personality Disorder & Suicidal Threats: Deconstructing the Manipulation Myth (makebpdstigmafree.wordpress.com)
- Unresolved grief part of family tragedy (iol.co.za)
- Suicide Prevention in Schools (socyberty.com)